remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
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