I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Duck Duck Cougar?
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.