And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Randomize
