i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
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