I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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