grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
We had sex on a dog bed..
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
