My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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