Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Randomize
