Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
