It's just like the Real World with babies
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
