I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize