just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
