Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize