No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
