Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
