Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk. http://tfl.nu/5huo
  Replies (4) Good night (821) Bad night (523) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle http://tfl.nu/nk60
  Replies (44) Good night (2538) Bad night (707) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat" http://tfl.nu/tv5w
  Replies (21) Good night (573) Bad night (2756) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too? http://tfl.nu/j0i5
  Replies (57) Good night (1136) Bad night (3725) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (772): you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted http://tfl.nu/vebg
  Replies (39) Good night (5109) Bad night (620)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat? http://tfl.nu/hd1u
  Replies (56) Good night (6815) Bad night (1924) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now? http://tfl.nu/rq4w
  Replies (17) Good night (2096) Bad night (3239) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  My grandma had to be escorted out by police.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): My grandma had to be escorted out by police. http://tfl.nu/ipgw
  Replies (18) Good night (6819) Bad night (831) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight? http://tfl.nu/82ga
  Replies (3) Good night (1296) Bad night (1429) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself. http://tfl.nu/dcvq
  Replies (1) Good night (980) Bad night (505) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster? http://tfl.nu/pms2
  Replies (6) Good night (3039) Bad night (1022) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that. http://tfl.nu/uw0f
  Replies (1) Good night (1282) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink http://tfl.nu/qhkh
  Replies (4) Good night (446) Bad night (884) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation. http://tfl.nu/ssju
  Replies (5) Good night (906) Bad night (258) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched http://tfl.nu/r5ws
  Replies (11) Good night (2549) Bad night (392) Order T-Shirt

Randomize