I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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