wake up i wanna do it froggy style
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I don't want my vagina anymore.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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