Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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