too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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