Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
there's paper in my vomit.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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