Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
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