i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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