i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
