i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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