so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
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Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
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Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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