Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
