At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
the day after is always just damage control
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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