i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize