just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize