You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Your cock deserves a montage
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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