hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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