I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize