and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
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