butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Swine flu. Run for my life!
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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