I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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