I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
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No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
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Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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