Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
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