Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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