Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
