You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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