What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
