Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
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Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
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The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
i now understand why vodka
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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