Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Randomize
