i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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