She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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