Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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