I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
