Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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