im having a threesome with these popsicles
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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